The best PS3 Story ever
Taken from here
i went out wednesday afternoon to the local walmart to start camping out. when i got there, there were already 12 people ther so i got in line being number 13. i talked around and found out the first 6 people there had been there since monday, total hardcore nerds all planning to keep them. bragging about how only they should get the system since theyve been there the longest. how they are so dedicated and how if you dont want to do the time, you shouldnt get a system. generally being complete assholes. good for them. we had a hours to pass so we became friends and played some cards and whatnot. the 6 guys in front kept to themselves and didnt associate with the rest of us. we were cool with each other leaving the line to get food, bathroom, smoke, etc since we all knew each other and as long as they were back in 30 minutes. i was about to leave to go buy some KFC for a good number of us and when i stepped out of line, one of the nerds shouted that if i left, i would lose my spot. the other guys told him that they were vouching for me and that i was just getting food but those 6 assholes didnt care. they said i leave, i lose my spot and that was the rules and they would call the manager (they had his number) to come out and enforce it. i said whatever and stayed in line.
a few hours later, the manager came out and told everyone that there were only going to be SEVEN available. they have them in their store and theyre not getting anymore. he told the people after # 7 they should leave if they wanted to not waste their time. me being number 13 should have left but i didnt, i wanted to stick around for a little bit more. everyone else left except me and the 7 other people that were getting it for sure. so the day goes on and i try to make friends with the nerds. i play mario kart on the ds with them and talk to them about the games they were getting. about an hour or 2 later, i tell im gonnna head home since im 8 in line and theres only 7 ps3s. one of them made some stupid joke about if i leave the line then i aint getting back in!! har har. so as im about to leave, i tell them im going to the vons next door and if any of them wanted any food or coffee and id bring it back to them. one of them said yea and all the rest like sheep followed and said yes too. they were gonna give me money but i told them it was on me since theyve been out here since monday. the 7th guy in line wanted some food and coffee and i told him id buy some for him also.
so i go to vons and buy 8 coffees, some food, and some x-lax laxatives. i bring it to my car and put some laxatives in 6 of the coffees and seperate them from mine and #7s. i pull back to walmart and bring all the drinks and food upfront. i give #7 his stuff and then the coffees with laxatives to the 6 nerds annd wish them good luck and go back to my car. i park it around the corner so i can still see them.
about 30 minutes later, #2 and 3 in line get up and it seemed like they were yelling to the other nerds. they both ran into walmart. seconds later (i guess all nerds have the same biology) #5 gets up and runs across the parking lot and into the trees and bushes somewhere. #1 is scrounging for this portapotty type thing he’d brought with him but he is squirting everywhere and all over his pants and their sleeping bags. he runs into walmart. at this time, i start my car and drive back to the walmart to claim my spot in line. when i get there #4 and 6 are gone but i dont know where. #7 is laughing his ass off so hard and i just smile at him. i call up 5 of the other people that i had made friends with that were in line with me ( i had their phone numbers cause i was gonne buy to food for everyone) and told them to get back to the walmart ASAP and get in line. Meanwhile, me and #7 threw all their shit into the parking lot and i claimed my spot as #1, him as #2. 4 and the people i had called arrived and got in line just as 1 of the nerds came running back and got #7. he started yelling saying they need their spots back. we all told them to fuck off, out of spot, out of line. it was all of us against him so he didnt say shit. the nerds came back and tried to start some shit but we just laughed, we told them it was their rule and to go fuck themselves and clean the shit off their pants. the called security and security came. security man was like WTF is that fuckin smell and looked at the nerds with shit all of them and kicked them off the grounds screaming LMAO. so that is how i got my ps3.
Wow. Sweet sweet revenge.
omar
November 18, 2006 at 12:16 PM
jesus man, thats fucking awesome
omar
November 18, 2006 at 12:16 PM
oh man thats fucking amazing
you rock
dsanchez
November 18, 2006 at 12:16 PM
bullshit.
karma
November 18, 2006 at 12:16 PM
may your PS3 catch fire and burn you in your sleep… :)
good thinking
November 18, 2006 at 12:16 PM
Yeah! Drugging people’s food and drink without their knowlege is hillarious.
Especially when your targets are 3-days low on fluids and sugars.
Nice revenge, but be carefull.
hater
November 18, 2006 at 12:16 PM
Wow! you really proved the old saying…it takes one to know one and you knew they were assholes. This story is bullshit.
kaa
November 18, 2006 at 12:16 PM
that’s mean
Gil Filar
November 18, 2006 at 12:16 PM
You’re actually an asshole. Some people might have allergies to laxatives, or it might have detrimental affects on them. The fact that you’d do this for something as meaningless as a video game system shows how disaffected and cruely materialistic you are. Good for you for adding insult to injury.
JimmyD
November 18, 2006 at 12:16 PM
All the power to ya man. They were cock masters and they got their just dessert. Even if they got sick, they had it coming. If someone can’t make an effort to be nice to their fellow man we don’t need their waste of skin in our society anyway.
Enjoy that PS3.
xdr
November 18, 2006 at 12:16 PM
hehe, this actually made my day. I’m a bit divided though on why to laugh though, part of me laughs because that I can’t understand why you want a ps3 so badly that you drug people to get it, and part of me cause I just wan’t to see their faces when they’ve been lining up for nothing at all.
zaki
November 18, 2006 at 12:16 PM
its really people like you who make me lose all faith in humankind, you turd
ps3greed
November 18, 2006 at 12:16 PM
Don’t know if its the same guy, but someone selling a PS3 put this story on their eBay auction and doubled their money. IMO it seems kind of fishy that the guy got peoples cell phone numbers. He clearly planned to drug them when he was number #8, but to have their cell phone numbers meant he planned to drug others in line from the beginning.
mynameishere
November 18, 2006 at 12:16 PM
All lies, probably. If true, then you should be in jail.
bobthechef
November 18, 2006 at 12:16 PM
Funny, yet I feel sorry for those nerds. It depends how I picture the situation. The more I picture the nerds as "assholes" the more my human weakness for revenge is willing to take pleasure in the situation. Maybe not really pleasure, but I can see the looks on these guys faces as they’re screaming and shitting all over the place. Priceless. Even though it’s kind of a turd thing to do.
lol
November 18, 2006 at 12:16 PM
Hi, I thought it was a pretty funny story. But yaddah yaddah, bottom line is: You were all waiting in the wrong line. If you’re going to be waiting to get a system, it might as well be the Wii (assuming you own the 360 already).
360 > Wii > PS3
Skiv
November 18, 2006 at 12:16 PM
They were assholes and got what was coming! Great story and enjoy the ps3!
pija parada
November 18, 2006 at 12:16 PM
this is so not true , post pics
GFrag
November 18, 2006 at 12:16 PM
Kind of a shit thing to do, since they were first in line, but it serves them right for that dumb "Don’t leave the line" thing.
It’s not like they’d have had to wait any longer, since you were already behind them in the first place…
Skidz
November 18, 2006 at 12:16 PM
That sounds like utter bullshit.
1. You paint them out to be arseholes without any real justificaion. Most who have responded assume that they therefore must be arseholes. Are you people sheep?
2. It doesn’t say a lot for those who responded in this thread if they think it’s alright to drug someone, yet it’s not okay fo someone to say ‘if you step out of line, you lose your spot’.
3. If any of this is true – and it smells like a huge pile of human excrement to me – a fantasy at best – well its pretty pathetic and I can only hope Karma finds and seeks you out with a vengence.
billy brown
November 18, 2006 at 12:16 PM
I just saved 15% on my car insurance by switching to geico.
Imranio
November 18, 2006 at 12:16 PM
If you really loved video gaming you would have shot them in the face and then laughed…
and when you got your ps3 showed them it and say…
oooh sorry how insensitive…you cant see….
I know I know im sick…too much video gaming :-D
doopdeedoop
November 18, 2006 at 12:16 PM
I call bullshit.
zerox master of malnutrition
November 18, 2006 at 12:16 PM
This story is wicked my favorite bit was the car chase and I love the way you make us hate the hero at first but then show how sensitive he can be your a great author keep on writing. I don’t know if your interested but I own a caravan park and if you like I’ll make you the full time security guard plus if you lick my arse I’ll throw in a free pension plan for you and your spouse. P.s karmas mum sleeps with the fishes, she not dead just a fuckin wierdo, her bit on the side is called seabass and he likes windy walks and the poetry of blake.
http://www.myspace.com/shiftos
Stan
November 18, 2006 at 12:16 PM
Even if it is bullshit, it is still a great story.
IQpierce
November 18, 2006 at 12:16 PM
Skidz said "Most who have responded assume that they therefore must be arseholes." Apparently he didn’t notice that his response is part of the MAJORITY which thinks that this is a "turd thing to do." Maybe he’s a sheep because he’s in the majority!!!
This story is fantastic. It might be untrue, but who cares, half of your history book could be untrue for all you know, just accept it at face value and enjoy it.
Hank
November 18, 2006 at 12:16 PM
Wow… How did so many people hear about this? Anyway, most people didn’t realize that **I** didn’t do this. Ever heard of a blockquote? Here’s one
>You’re actually an asshole.
See how I did that? That means that **I am quoting that.**